Some time
ago a friend referred to me as “the passionate ponderer” because ideas would
often come to me unexpectedly. I’d say,
“ooh, ooh, I’ve got to jot that down.”
It quickly became a running joke.
I have notebooks filled with little tidbits of wisdom, random thoughts
that lay dormant for years. I’ve often
heaped judgment on myself, as I’ve revisited those pages, wondering why I could
generate promising, creative ideas, but not possess any follow-through. Years ago when I loved golf and played it
passionately, I often reminded myself to keep my head down and follow through
with my swing. If I did that, the ball
would occasionally soar and land approximately where I hoped it would.
Funny how I
can now see a correlation between current anxieties about taking up golf again
and tackling those once-important ideas still languishing in old, outdated
notebooks. I don’t view the golf game as
critical anymore; it’s just the thought that it was one area long ago where I
felt confident and proud; that wasn’t often the case in other areas of my life
as I was growing up.
And now I
need to embrace those “random notebooks” from the past and appreciate their
very existence. Maybe it’s enough to
know that those simple, random thoughts excited me at one point! They don’t always have to have a destination.
Footnote—in
a quote—“The more I wonder . . . the more I love.” (Alice Walker)
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